An Unexpected Home Birth Story

I’m very happy to share this birth story from my friends Tom and Joyce! Nathan is their firstborn, and they were planning to have him at Toronto’s birth centre. Things unfolded faster than expected, however, and they ended up having him at home. A week after Nathan was born, Tom shared this on their pregnancy blog, and I love hearing the story from his perspective!

In a surprise for everybody (including ourselves), baby Nathan arrived a week early! Meaning this is in fact a post partum update. We have had the pleasure of his company for a week now. As you might guess, we’re deviating from the traditional format to tell the story of his birth. Also this update is from Tom because, well, because Joyce is tired. I’m writing this right now from my phone with baby Nathan in my lap.

The story of his arrival is quite amazing and I’m not even sure after a week whether we’ve fully processed it.
To start off though, I’ll give a bit of background. Joyce had been preparing and looking forward to giving birth without an epidural and at the Toronto Birth Centre. In addition, many of the articles and advice we had heard prior to the birth was to avoid getting too excited early on as we understood it generally takes a while at the beginning. As Nathan is our first we also expected him to arrive past the due date, not before.

None of that happened and in a rather spectacular fashion. The first warning sign actually occurred Saturday night when Joyce was woken up repeatedly via contractions while she was sleeping. We chalked this up to her body getting prepared and ignored it.

STRIKE ONE!

We woke up on Sunday and decided to go ahead with our normal routine. We went to church and Joyce even handled the sound equipment for the praise team! We had some snacks and then we bought some groceries assuming everything was normal. We went home and I did some stuff on my own while Joyce experienced more contractions. We didn’t time them and again assumed it was just early labour.

STRIKE TWO!

The pain was increasing at this point and Joyce was starting to get worried. If early labour was going to be this painful, she doubted her ability to handle the actual labour. Little did she know… We called the midwife who didn’t seem alarmed but said she would drop by later to “tuck her in”. We were reassured and I went about some chores while Joyce sat in bed in pain.

STRIKE THREE!

Finally the midwife arrived and took a look at Joyce. We talked briefly about the pain and what to do. It was at that time that she checked out Joyce and determined that she was fully dialated! The midwife suggested that there wasn’t enough time to even go to the Birth Centre but there might be for the hospital. She recommended that we do it at the house. Both of us were so shocked we just agreed.

YOU’RE OUTTA THERE NATHAN!

I would think in retrospect that with what happened we would feel shock for awhile but the truth is that it happened so quickly we didn’t really have time. Joyce started pushing during her contractions while I started running around getting the house ready. I found a shower curtain to put under Joyce and ran out to the midwife’s car to get her equipment. With my adrenaline pumping, I lifted two huge heavy bags like they were nothing. The midwife immediately called for another midwife to join us. She also started coaching Joyce through her contractions. In a short time, a second midwife came and they conferred right away. They got all their equipment ready and had everything laid out. Just like that our master bedroom was converted into a birth centre.

From there on in, the pace accelerated if that’s even possible. I immediately notified Joyce’s parents about the labour. They were on standby to come to Toronto and help out for two weeks. They thought that labour would take awhile and responded they would leave the next morning.

Imagine our surprise again when the midwife said he would be coming in the next hour! Oh my gosh. In about an hour and a half of pushing, the midwife started to see the head. At this point the midwives were encouraging Joyce to push more and more. Joyce was really screaming and it was obvious to me she was in pain. They were also taking his heartbeat with the Doppler on regular occasions. When it was apparent his heart rate was dropping the midwife immediately ordered Joyce to push really hard. She did and out he came, crying right away.

After that, Joyce was stitched up. Joyce was immediately relieved and looked quite good especially considering her ordeal. All did not go according to plan again as there was tearing and she needed stitches. The midwife tended to that and we began a slow clean up of the room. Again it was obviously a painful experience for Joyce. Shortly thereafter the placenta came out as well. More cleanup. Weighing and poking and prodding of Nathan was done.

At one point Joyce had to go to the washroom. It took awhile, in fact too long because when she finally stood up she was very lightheaded. Thankfully the midwife was there because she fainted and needed the midwife to hold her. I could do nothing because I was holding onto Nathan and wasn’t sure if I should put him down. Thankfully the other midwife came and helped and brought her back to the bed.

Honestly I don’t remember too much after that. The midwife talked to us some more and cleaned up the rest of her stuff. Nathan was set up beside to Joyce to sleep. I brought up a futon to put on the floor beside the bed in case I needed to help Joyce to the washroom. And then we slept. And changed diapers and slept some more.

There is the story of our first son’s birth Nathan. It was quite an experience. I am amazed at the birth process and at my wonderful wife for her strength not to mention pain tolerance. I’m also amazed at what every mother must go through and have a great deal more respect for every mother out there. I feel that this experience has only brought us closer together. And of course I and Joyce are so happy to have our newest addition join us.